89 of the state-mandated 90 days consisting of five grueling evaluations went by before we found out on June 14th that our Twinkie son was accepted into the incredible special services preschool program in our town. Luckily Bernie was able to make it to the meeting, as it was much more overwhelming than I expected it would be. After reviewing all of the evaluations, they told us they'd like to have him in the program, and without hesitation tears began to stream down my face uncontrollably. Yeah, he would be getting the help he needs! Oh no, he's going to be classified and have an IEP! I was mentally prepared for all of this, but the emotions erupted none-the-less.
It was on that day that we found out more about the program...The program itself is fantastic, so we couldn't ask for more, but it was not what we were expecting for our family. All along, we thought it would be a half day program (another mom had told me it was when her son was in it a couple of years ago, and it was on the school website as such), so it would be in addition to his existing pre-k schooling (they were signed up for transitional K this fall, 5 mornings a week, since they don't turn 5 til late Oct.) When I asked the case manager during the evaluation process about the program, she said she didn't want to say anything until the evaluations were done. So, it was on the day he was accepted into the program that they told us how it's a full day program and integrated with the normal preschool. Wow, that was great news....his Twinkie sister could attend the same school! So, we were super psyched, and I called to sign her up right away. Unfortunately, the only person in the entire office who knew diddly-squat was out with the flu for 2 days, so I had to leave messages. On day 4 we received a call back, saying to come in and fill out the application, but when I arrived an hour later, I was told that the 2 classes were full, AND there are already 2 kids on the wait list. (Yes, round 2 of SERIOUS CRYING.) Another week of phone calls,
So, now it's mid-July, and after being hopeful our twins would be able to attend the same school in the same town, we found out how crazy opposite their schedules will be....public vs. Christian school; schools in 2 different towns, because we live in Franklin Lakes but work in Midland Park. We considered trying to get her in another preschool in our town, however, we love the preschool they've been attending for the last 2 years: Our daughter is going to have the same teacher she had last year, they knows the whole situation we are faced with, and they've offered to let me drop her off early, if we need to. Truly awesome. Plus it's only 4 blocks from our office and 1 block from my in-laws. Again, can you say AWESOME!It will only be a year, because this is just a preschool program, and we will survive. I know we will...we all will. It's just not how we were hoping it would go: The words keep going around in my head, "If they had just told us about the program at the beginning of the 90 days, we would have signed his sister up months ago"..."it would have been worth the risk to lose the application fee, just to save ourselves the hassle"..."If he were in a program that wasn't integrated, then we wouldn't have had the hopes that she could even go to his school!"
But, alas, all that is behind us now. The fun is ahead of us...spending more time with each of our Twinkies, seeing them grow in ways we can't even fathom, and knowing that this is all part of God's plan for us. Sure, I don't like the math, but it could be a much worse equation!
How about you...have you dealt with separating your children due to special services?
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